wtf...

...I have no idea why I can't be sane and/or normal. My mind seems to just flutter out of control sometimes...most of the time. The odd part is that I am able to identify and sort of observe my mind do these cartwheels and see the err but can do nothing about it. Partially because I'm schizo and one personality and seperately watch the others but still...I just wish I could be normal.

I keep wanting to date and I've even gotten over my plan to get things together before I start to date seriously, but I know that's too much of a risk. My wanting to date ends up taking alot of time, that it shouldn't and sometimes I stoop to lows that I'm ashamed of.

But first things first...I need to get rid of this gut.

My mom saw it as I was holding my baby nephew and told me to stop eating so late...funny thing is...I don't. I eat a salad of grilled chicken and spinach every night about an hour before I go to bed. Another funny thing is...I've lost about 6lbs, from not going to the gym...wtf...